Retro Weekends – Whomp ‘Em

First Contact

I’m not sure but I think I came across this game in the video rental store, L.A. Video. I could be wrong though since the cartridge here might come from the now defunct Boltron Video. It still has that green sticker on it, though the material of it has really worn off to a transparent beige color. The back of it still has the void sticker. Not sure how we ended up owning it, nor when exactly we decided to rent it. But it’s fully ours now that both L.A. Video and Boltron are long gone.

Memorable Moments

I remember little from the game. But dear lord do I remember how much hell this game put me through in certain parts. First was the boss of Secret Cliff. He was a huge pain in my ass since he would bounce off the walls at nearly un-dodgable speeds. My reflexes as a kid, like most of us, were terrible. I had yet to realize that Secret Guardian had a pattern to his bouncing. In the end it was all about memorization and being in a spot where you could avoid being hit. I forgot to mention that unlike Mega Man, the bosses are not weak to the abilities you gain. So every fight is like fighting with the Mega Buster.

The next boss that I just couldn’t stand was the boss to the the Ice Ritual, Ice Guardian. Um, before I talk about how ass this boss was, There’s something interesting I’d like to share. As stated on SydLexia, this stage was was actually called the Realm of Darkness in Saiyuuki World 2. For some reason, the U.S. branch of Jaleco ended up calling this stage Ice Ritual, even though there’s no ice to speak of. Maybe they thought the setting was an ice world. Anyway, the boss of this was a pain for two reasons. The first was that he would split up into four and then reconverge. To make matters worse, he does this every time he’s hit and splits at 90 degree angles. So that means if you hit him, he’ll immediately counter it. The second thing was that if he was low on health and you happened to have a Magic Potion on you (which restored you life if you died), he would steal it from you if he touched you and restore his own health! What an asshole! I hated this boss so freaking much, him and the Secret Guardian.

But none of that would prepare me for the hell that would be the Final Test. This took place in what looks to be the Heavens (which would make more sense in the original context). The difficulty spike on this was immense, probably the biggest in all of gaming. I mean, here you have this game with pretty easy stages and a couple of asshole bosses. Then you hit this stage, it’s like going from Super Princess Peach to Ninja Gaiden. The stage was abnormally long, you constantly bounced off clouds since there wasn’t much solid ground to speak of, and all of those abilities, save for two or three, were useless. Then there’s the uppermost part where the gravity is turned off. Now it’s very easy to just careen into otherwise easily avoidable enemies. I never got past this part and to this day have never finished the game.

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